As long as there have been love stories there have been criminal lovers who hit the road together in order to avoid the law. This isn’t the same as criminal couples where both man and woman are criminals and on the lam as much to save their own individual butts as to be together. I don’t know whether the male is the criminal more often than women (couldn’t find those stats) but in my personal opinion that would probably be the case. In matters of love, women tend to make decisions based on emotion, rather than rationality. In general, men’s are more rational and less emotional when making difficult decisions.
I came across a cool blog that warned women who are preparing themselves to go on the lam with their criminal husbands or boyfriends, that life as a fugitive is not a happy one. Since I’ve never considered running away with a fugitive, none of these warnings ever occurred to me. It might be helpful for any women readers who are struggling with the decision to go on the lam. Here are factors for you to consider:
- Say goodbye to family. You won’t be spending Christmas Holidays or Thanksgiving with your parents and siblings anymore. You can’t show up for family dinner and not get nailed by the fuzz.
- Say goodbye to your children. You’ll have to be pretty hardened if you can give up your own child for a man, and a dangerous, wanted man at that. Consider that if you are on the lam for years, you will miss out on their lives, their stages, precious moments with them. Assuming you are a fugitive for several years, by the time you are caught (and you will be) they will be young adults and complete strangers who want nothing to do with you.
- Say goodbye to friends. Lifelong friends will be out of the picture. It will be pretty difficult to make new friends in case you blow your cover. New “friends” won’t hesitate to turn you in when they discover your real identity, especially where a reward is involved. Money talks. A couple profiled below, Catherine Greig and White Bulger, fit this description to a “T“. Not only did Catherine have to leave friends behind, her domineering lover refused to allow her to make new friends just because.
- Say goodbye to security and stability. It’s possible that you will never put down roots in one place for too long. Home will be wherever you hang your hat and not “where the heart is.”
- Say hello to constant worry and fear. Going incognito isn’t as exciting as in the movies. You will constantly worry about being discovered. You’ll spend your life looking over your shoulder.
- You are a criminal by association. Running with a fugitive makes you a fugitive since you live to hide him. That’s a felony offence. You could face up to 12 years in maximum security prison depending on which jurisdiction you hail from.
- Prepare for abuse. If your criminal lover begins to abuse you, there isn’t much you can do about it except leave him and turn yourself in. “But he loves me! He would never do that!” you insist. He’s a criminal. He is capable of anything especially if he has abused, raped or murdered women. Stop kidding yourself. I don’t know if Bulger abused Catherine physically but I’d put money that he did. He was once described as a rageaholic. And Catherine certainly was his emotional punching bag.
- Don’t be surprised if he abandons you for another woman. He may pick up a new “piece” for himself, or he may simply decide that you are too much baggage and abandon you in a strange place where you don’t know the language and don’t know how to get help. What a sweetheart. Beautiful Catherine wasn’t Bulger’s first choice for his Irish mafia moll. He fluctuated between Catherine and a woman named Theresa Stanley, another blonde beauty, and ultimately lived with her for 20 years, even while he was involved with Catherine. The turd.
- He will drain your bank account. He won’t have his own and you both need money, even on the lam.
- He will pimp you out. After draining all your money, you will need more. There are two easy, illegal ways to do this: (1) drugs (2) prostitution. Guess which role you will play?
- He will get you hooked on drugs. Just another way to assure himself that you will stay with him and depend on him.
- He will keep you locked inside your small living quarters. Sometimes fugitives remain in one place for years without getting caught. Catherine stayed in a tacky, small apartment with Bulger without ever leaving the apartment. No dining out. No having friends over. No nothing. Yawn.
- He will betray you. When the two of you are finally arrested, he will insist this was your idea and he will blame you for all the crimes he has committed while on the run. Nice guy.
- He will kill you. Last but not least, should push come to shove and he believes you are going to betray him (whether or not this is true), you won’t have to worry about life on the run anymore. You won’t have to worry about life at all. How it was that Bulger didn’t murder either of his two mistresses is a mystery. He certainly murdered helpless, beautiful women before he met them, for utterly inane reasons.
Catherine Elizabeth Greig
A notorious example of some of the above predictions is Catherine Greig, a woman who stood by her criminal lover, Whitey Bulger, a mafioso 20 years her senior, wanted for 19 assassinations, extortions, money laundering and other charges. A real prize of a man. After 16 years of running the two were finally brought to justice in Santa Monica, California. Catherine was divorced from her first (and only) husband, Bobby McGonagle, a firefighter who moon lighted as a mob member. Catherine became acquainted with Bulger a few years after her divorce from McGonagle when Bulger shot and killed her two brothers-in-law. Bulger took a shot at Catherine’s ex-husband and missed. She then dated her ex-husbands’ would-be killer and fell in love with him. Catherine was a bit of a thrill seeker you might say. In fact, Catherine may have been a hybristophiliac – a person who experiences sexual arousal upon being with a partner known to have committed an outrage, or crime, such as rape, murder, or armed robbery. How Catherine developed such a bizarre and disturbing personality disorder is open for speculation.
What is truly disturbing is that Bulger murdered a beautiful young woman by strangulation. It never occurred to Catherine that this show of misogyny might extend to her. Blondes. According to testimony, when she wanted to end a romantic relationship with a mafia member named Flemmi, he brought her to the house of Mr. Bulger’s mother and watched Mr. Bulger crush her windpipe with his forearms. Talk about loyalty to your friend. Which brings us to the issues faced by Catherine in dating a man on the lam. You don’t really get to go out much. The couple didn’t have a car. They dined with no one. Whitey sat on a couch watching television day after day for the 15 years they lived in a small apartment in Santa Monica. That this is what was left of Whitey’s life after he stopped killing people, and that a younger, attractive woman like Catherine accepted this as a lifestyle, tells us a lot about these two people.
Bulger shunned contact and forced Catherine to do the same. According to a Santa Monica neighbor, “I got the feeling from several encounters that he was a rageaholic. She was a lovely person, and when I would say hello, he would say, ‘Don’t talk to her!'” Catherine always accepted Whitey’s directions: “When he called out to her, she acted as if he did this wonderful thing and God had called to her,” according to another neighbor. Does this paint a picture of two personalities? One is a psychopath, the other, a person very unsure of herself. In spite of Catherine’s devotion to Bulger , he had another home with Theresa Staney, a single mother of four, with whom he lived for 20 years. In fact, Whitey first went on the run with Theresa Stanley. Despite their active life together Theresa wearied of her itinerant lifestyle. After traveling around the country, “Stanley was bored with sightseeing and tired of being alone with the aloof Bulger and his long silences. In the last couple of weeks Stanley had hesitated to even ask simple questions like, where are we going now? Still Catherine remained amazingly devoted to Bulger, even though she knew she was his second choice as a mafia moll. By the time they were arrested Bulger was 81, Catherine, 60. She had nothing to show for her life except a felony record, 8 years in prison, a $150,000.00 fine, and inexplicable loyalty to a mafia member. Steep price to pay for love.